South African Founder Challenges the Status Quo 
By: Erika Y. Gradecki, Senior Editor, ATAC Magazine

    When you hear the name ‘In Bed International’, what is your first instinct? Do you take the name literally, or just figuratively? Do your thoughts only revolve around the topic of sex, a seemingly ‘taboo’ topic in Africa?

     Well, much to your surprise folks, ‘In Bed International’ means something more than what the name stands for. In fact, it “represents the voice of the young people who have a vision of exploring not just themselves, but the world.”
     According to the company’s founder, Gugu ‘Abby’ Banda, In Bed International, based in New York City, USA, has within two years, accumulated a following of more than 20,000 members from around the world. They believe in spreading the message of “cultural awareness and acceptance”. Whether it’s through her blog or her videocast, Banda has more than just a story to tell – she has words of wisdom.      “We are so caught up in our own beliefs that we don’t sit down and get to familiarize ourselves with other people,” explains Banda, a native of South Africa. “And as you know, people fear what they do not understand. And where there’s some level of fear, there’s bound to be conflict. Where there’s conflict, there’s bound to be war...war that can be avoided by simply understanding each other’s belief systems and working together in alleviating much more important issues such as poverty and illness.”
     When talking to Banda, you feel at ease…she’s one of those women whom you feel you’ve known forever, as her personality and her infectious energy generates a sense of comfort that doesn’t come around every day. When watching her videocast or reading her blog, one can see that both her spoken and written words are R-E-A-L. Being true to herself is something Banda abides by, something that came from several experiences as a young girl.
     “A lot of people ‘FIND’ themselves in their ‘30s and ‘40s…I found myself at 13,” Banda says about an experience with a teacher who had said she’d ‘never amount to anything’. “I found my purpose and from that day I began to challenge just about everything that my culture taught me.”
     In addition to school experiences, experiences at home also had a major effect on Banda. When she was 16, Banda’s elder brother died at age 20, leaving behind Banda, her sister Bo, and her mother behind.
     “He was the rock of our family, sort of like a father figure,” Banda remembers. “He absorbed all the stresses and made sure that my younger sister and I only got the lighter end of the many issues that our family was facing at the time.”
     In light of her brother’s passing, Banda found a brighter side in the aftermath. She began to live.
     “I became aware of my own mortality,” she says. “I wanted to use each and every minute doing things that made me happy. I confronted injustices more openly and became more assertive.”
     “I slowly came out of the shell, took martial arts classes, because now that we didn’t have big brother for protection, one needed to fight her own battles,” Banda continues. “It is on that journey that I learned that just because you know how to fight, doesn’t mean you have to. I learned to deal with the pain because after what I’d gone through, my worst fears had been realized and I had nothing to be afraid of anymore.” 
     Banda’s enthusiasm and “passionate approach to life” was the result, and as Banda grew older, she became extremely self-sufficient in every aspect of the word. At one point, Banda was the Youth Counsel Director for the Durban Youth Interactive Committee in South Africa, and “held every power position you can imagine”.
     “Anything that involved standing up for something or someone, I was head of and I did a great job at it,” she notes.
     Moving to America nine years ago gave Banda a chance to spread her message even further. Expected only to stay a year, Banda’s goal initially was to “learn what made Americans a superpower” and to accumulate some income in order to go back to South Africa and become a lawyer.
     “I didn’t expect to be sucked in the ‘American Dream’ mentality, but I did,” explains Banda. “The more I saw successful people, the more I realized that I had to give MY goals an upgrade. I didn’t just want to host a few events here and there around Durban, but I wanted to create a LEGACY.”
     “I learned to put value on the young people,” she continues. “At home, you know, it’s all about the adults, and kids should be ‘seen, not heard’…totally opposite in the USA. The spirit of a child is something that should never be tainted.”
     What Banda saw different from her homeland was a country that “invested on nurturing the young minds”, something that she truly admired about America.
     “I realized that a culture is something that you create on your own, in your own backyard,” explains Banda. “It’s not what the crowds says. It’s what you and the ones close to you feel most comfortable doing and I think THAT’S the American approach to anything, only they call it ‘freedom of expression’.”
     And along came “In Bed International”.
     Banda used her own ‘freedom of expression’ for fun, as she posted up blogs and videos on her Facebook page on topics that included beauty, fashion, lifestyle and of course, sex. What was done out of boredom, as Banda says it, became something more. Her page “blew up” – with people who commented on how much they liked what she had to say.
     Now, today, with supporters from as far as Australia, China, and her homeland, Mother Africa, In Bed has expanded to also include a video pilot, which was released last year and starred Banda, her sister Bo, and special guest host, Cat Mpanza, a well-known South African model and actress. The goal is to get picked up by several television networks back in Africa.
     Though Banda has had much success with In Bed and appreciates having ‘somewhere else to call home’, she has not forgotten her roots and holds her native homeland close to her heart.
     “There’s something about Africa, its essence, its intense simplicity, and its resilience that can never be compared to any other continent.”
     Walking down “Main Street”.
     In addition to producing and starring in the ‘In Bed’ show, Banda notes that there is a new production that “inspires and motivates young people from all over the world to look beyond their circumstance and dream bigger”. The show, known as “Main Street”, is a semi-reality and talk show that follows the day-to-day life of six cast members, all of which are business women who are from various parts of Africa and the Caribbean and work in different fields. 
     “We want to portray to our viewers what we go through – the struggles, the good, and the ugly of being a woman in business,” Banda explains. “Main Street is about breaking the stereotype of who [we] Africans are. The international media has had their chance over the years, decades even, where they’ve portrayed us in a certain way. Now, we feel that if we don’t take the opportunity as young African/Caribbean descendants to actually show the world who we are, then we cannot complain about the depiction that we see every day on TV.”
     Members of the cast include Banda herself, as well as her sister Bo, founder/editor of Taylored Magazine; Fashion Consultant for RJB fashion agency, Roodelyne Jean-Baptiste of Haiti; Sesima Kamara (Liberia), founder of Epic Productions; founder & CEO of Mon Utopie Ideale PR, Ijeoma Genevieve Mbamalu (Nigeria), and Wendy Ekua Quansah of Ghana, founder of YuShape.

From left to right: Abby, Wendy, Ijeoma, Roodelyne, Sesima, Bo     

One of the main goals of “Main Street” is to not only “transcend the cultural barriers”, but also to break away from the stereotypical female role in society.
     “We are taking our identity back as women and claiming our power, while maintaining the virtues of femininity and using our cultural background to guide us morally,” Banda adds.
     From “In Bed” to “Main Street” or whatever else she decides to do, Banda will definitely be leaving a legacy.